Unlimited power!

The Man has been addressing me as "Darth Mauser" of late -- I'm not exactly certain what that's supposed to mean, but the low, almost sinister tone of his voice suggests that it is a title of some respect. It had better be. Just to keep him in line, I bit his leg real good. We'll see how clever he is with that limp.

He and the Woman have been away quite a bit lately, and usually return smelling of popcorn. I don't know where they go, but it's quite possible they are driven into hiding in fear of me.

And no wonder -- my powers seem to be growing. Over the last few days, there has been a LOT of water coming from the sky. Once, when I was out patrolling my territory, the torrent became so great that I found myself trapped beneath a shrub. My frustration turned to anger, my anger to rage, and then suddenly there was a tremendous flash, a great surge of raw power, and then an overwhelming explosion that shook the firmament. I didn't know I could do that!

Somewhat shaken, I returned to my base of operations to find my bowl empty, and suddenly there was another great flash and a thunderous blast in the sky. I found myself slightly unnerved by the implications of this. And the Rodent had a stroke.

I haven't been able to do it since, but I'm working on it, searching the depths and recesses of my soul for the secret to these latent abilities. And rest assured, when I fully harness these powers, we'll see a new order around here... starting with a rewriting of the feeding schedule.