Impressive

I didn't know the Rodent had it in him. He's so nauseatingly cuddly, not to mention leaky and snorty, always doing that ridiculous tap dance of his and making blinky eyes at the Woman, and so weirdly proportioned, so clumsy and bendy and squat... I assumed the jungle had been bred or wiggled out of him long ago.

But the disembowling he visited upon the Tendriled Blue Muppet was a sight to behold. I myself am a proponent of the quick, neat kill and the tidy trophy, but I admit that sometimes a frenzied, gory evisceration is just the ticket.

There's no denying the powerful impact a good splattering of entrails can have on all bystanders, myself included. And even a cool, deliberate nightstalker like me can remember the mad euphoric rush of sudden, murderous violence and wanton bloodshed. After all, these fangs aren't just for pretty.

Seeing the organs and viscera fly like that made me yearn for the savanna, where my fathers gorged themselves on fields of plump turkey breast and wild herds of prairie tuna, and the wiser of the blue octopi kept to the trees. Perhaps the Rodent and I were cousins there. Pehaps we met in battle as equals. He may be 7/8ths bunny rabbit now, but by my claws there's some hyena in him yet.

What's more, this brings to a decisive end the perpetual squeaking and squawking of that damned Tendriled Muppet — a blessing in of itself.

I don't believe Fabio witnessed the slaughter. Fabio would do well to pay closer attention to these things. Because if the Rodent goes looking for more viscera, I know where he can get it cheap and by the pound.