January 30, 2008

I find these geometrically homogeneous meatbits intriguing

Now this is just not natural.

I have slain and ingested many a strange creature over my many years, from the plump, bitterish fly to the dry-yet-velvety moth; from the succulent, squirty mouse to the butternutty squirrel (melts in your mouth); from the exquisite, delectable finch to the gaggishly chewy, nasty-boy-nasty crow.

And none, none of these critters was ever even remotely squarish. Boxy, at best — but never square. And certainly not cubic.

Yet somehow, I am now being served a rather disturbing oddity: tiny squishy meat cubes.

Unsettling, to say the least. This cannot be good. What manner of varmint is so configured to yield such small, perfectly matched polyhedronic bits? Certainly nothing I have encountered. Are these bugs? Mollusks? They taste distinctly mammalian — but any mammal of such dimensions as could accommodate meatblocks of this kind must surely be the most bizarre and unholy of aberrations.

I should be conerned. That is to say, I should be more concerned. The truth is, this freakmeat tastes just damn good. So very damn good. Whatever carcass it came off, it's like no marrow I have slurped before.

Don't misunderstand — I'm still uneasy about all this. But then, sometimes, you just have to pick your battles and take some things on faith. After all, it beats the hell out of crow.

Oh, and the gravy also is excellent.

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